How to Set Boundaries During the Holiday Season

Sometimes it seems like it might be better for everyone if we just called off life during the last two months of the year—between fickle weather and holidays every other week or so, it can seem like there is just no time to make progress toward your personal goals, or even to take a breath! Many life coaching clients report frustration during this season, sometimes even giving up on their goals and insisting that they will “reset” with a New Year’s Resolution. This might work but setting good boundaries might be just as effective. Read on to find out how to keep the time you need for the things you need to do, even during the holidays.

1. Assess your commitments.
Before the holiday season, you need to define your boundaries. Just like setting up the “in” and “out” areas of sports, you need to decide where your boundaries lie. This is a great step to plan with a skilled life coach in New Jersey, as a life coach can help you to explore and express these priorities. Figure out how many tasks you have compared to the time and energy you have and figure out what you realistically want to do.

2. Schedule and commit.
Now that you’ve planned, set it to paper! Or the calendar on your phone, whatever suits you. The important thing is that you schedule those things that are important to you, so you don’t get stuck thinking you have “nothing” to do. Want to see a holiday light display? Pencil it in between picking grandma up from the airport and holiday brunch the next day. Buy tickets in advance for popular events and share your plans with family and friends. The lure of “let’s just stay in” is less compelling when all the work is done for you.

3. Say no!
This is the hardest part of setting boundaries. Tap into your inner two-year-old and say “no!” You can stomp your foot and shake your head for effect if you need, but the only person you need to convince is usually yourself.

4. Embrace flexibility.
That schedule you made in step two? Not the holy grail. If you truly want to do something, find a way to make time for it, even if it means skipping out on something else. Remember, doing what you love is more important that doing what you planned.

5. Remember the basics.
You, just like every other being, have physical needs! You need to eat some healthy foods, get enough sleep to feel rested, and exercise for at least a little bit each day just to take care of your body and be at your best. Many people cut into this time for other tasks, but don’t be tempted. You’ll be better off well-fed, rested, and exercised!
For more great tips, visit the Life Coach JB blog regularly for new articles!

Flow: What it is, How to find it

Do you flow? Many people think of flow, and they think of smoothness, consistency, and ease. You’re not wrong! However, there is a very specific definition of flow in productivity and wellness, and we’re going to talk about it today. Julie Barros has worked with many people in New Jersey for life coaching, helping them to visualize their goals, improve productivity, feel better, or just take the next step. Flow is a great tool in this process, so read on to find out what it is and how to feel it!

What is Flow?
Flow was first named and defined by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi in 1975, including the state of being fully immersed in an activity, energized, focused, fully involved and enjoying it. When people flow, they often report the sensation that time is disappearing, without feeling pressured or uncomfortable. Time spent playing your favorite phone game, talking with your best friend on the phone, or engaging in an interesting project often produces a flow state.

What does flow do for me?
Sure, flow sounds like a great way to work, but does it have benefits aside from being enjoyable? It sure does! When you flow, you are likely to enjoy your work more, be more productive while still feeling energized, and you’ll avoid the dreaded concept of burnout! Many people who seek life coaching in New Jersey want to find a way to reclaim their “flow” in what they do!

How can I “flow” more?
You can’t force flow, but you can make it more likely to keep happening. A key component of flow is to manage frustration and boredom. Think of an exciting scavenger hunt where you have to search for each item for a few minutes, and maybe some a little longer, but they are always discoverable. Now, think of a scavenger hunt where everything is neatly lined up on a table. Boring, right? Alternatively, think of a scavenger hunt that is nearly impossible and each item takes hours to find—if you can find it at all. This would be so frustrating that you might give up. Situations where you are challenged, but not too much, are the best for promoting flow. Of course, eliminating distractions and focusing on what you truly love can help as well.

While we would love to live in the flow state all day, this is not always possible. However, a skilled life coach can help you meet these goals and feel great about your accomplishments!

Learn To STOP and Make Better Decisions

Part of my job as a life coach is helping people make good decisions. While I am not a judge, parent, or sage wise-woman who knows your inner desires, I have studied the best ways to create and maintain healthy changes. When I work with clients for life coaching, I use a variety of techniques to help you understand, express, and move toward your goals and dreams. I see this as a collaborative process, like working with a skilled mountain climbing guide to scale a mountain. However, sometimes, you just need a quick tool to make a great decision on your own. Today, I am going to teach you how to STOP!

The Importance of Sleep to High Performance

Could you use a nap? If so, you’re not alone: Up to a third of Americans report that they don’t get the sleep they need to feel rested. But this is just a part of normal life, right? Think again! This week, we’ll be talking about the importance of sleep for high performance in your life—whether that’s making important decisions at work, being there for your family, or just feeling great about yourself. As a life coach, I have seen plenty of people who are sick and tired—of not sleeping!

Spring-Cleaning For Your Life

With spring finally arriving, many of the clients I see for life coaching are pleased to escape the cold, snowy winter. A time-honored spring tradition is cleaning, and nothing makes you want to clean your house more than the fresh scent of flower blossoms blowing in the window. While cleaning your home is a great spring activity, you can expand this process and “spring clean” your life. Read on to find out how!

Top Tips for Motivation When You’re Feeling Stuck

As a life coach, one of the things that many of my clients come to me with is a feeling of being “stuck.” They ask “how can I take the next step?” or “how can I get out of this slump?” While the best way to get motivated and start making the changes you need to make in your life is by working with a skilled life coach in New Jersey, there are also plenty of DIY options that you can try yourself! Here are my favorite “quick tips” to boost motivation when you’re feeling stuck.

Input and Output: Why Nutrition Matters

Some people are surprised when they visit a life coach and are asked about their nutrition and dietary habits. “But I’m not looking to lose weight!” is a response I often hear, and it’s a fair response—but nutrition is about far more than just weight management, and plenty of people who are at a very healthy weight are still sabotaging their progress and success due to what they are eating. Read on to find out why nutrition is so important to getting anything done!

Why Self-Care is Important—to You and Others

Many of the people who visit my office for life strategy coaching are genuinely kind, selfless, sacrificing people. They start by telling me how they give so much to others, whether that is family, friends, work, or charity, that they don’t have anything left for themselves. When I tell them that they aren’t doing themselves or others a favor, many are surprised. Today, we’ll talk about self-care, and how it can help you be more giving and responsive to others.